Here I am again, about to ramble on again about things on my heart. Sorry if this post doesn't make sense. I don't have the words to describe what I'm thinking and feeling right now. God is showing me things right now but I'm not sure what to make of it. Please just bear with me:
Ever since I was little, I've known that God told me to be a missionary. Now, we're all called to be missionaries. Don't think that you can get off easy if you're not feeling "called" to the foreign field. If we're here in the USA or wherever you are, we as the church of Christ MUST get out and tell people about the Lord. No sitting on our rear ends in church pews on Sunday mornings then going out and living just about however we want for the rest of the week.
I have felt that the Lord is leading me to the foreign field ever since I've been about 8 years old. At first, I thought He wanted me to go to Papua New Guinea as a missionary nurse. So I pursued that dream for 7 long years and He finally gave me my dream and let me go to PNG for 5 wonderfully horrible and challenging weeks. But while there, He seemed to be leading me to Mexico. You see, I didn't realize it but God had been planting a seed in my heart all along this journey to PNG. That tiny seed was a love for my amigos. This would eventually lead to a full blown desire to go to Mexico as a missionary. When I came home from PNG, I enrolled in a community college as a nursing major but it didn't take long (like, not even half the semester) before I figured out that I wasn't supposed to do nursing. At least for now.
After my trip, I found a language school in Guadalajara, Mexico that sounds amazing and I totally jumped on that opportunity right away, immediately making plans about what I was going to do and how I was going to go to Guadalajara to learn the language this year. Well, I've been praying very seriously about this for about the past month and God is slowly showing me things. Yesterday in church we sang the song "In His time". It doesn't say in MY time but GOD'S time. *sigh* Seasons of learning like this are NOT fun but are so necessary. I'm not saying that I will not go to Mexico. But God has been opening my eyes to Mexico that is HERE in my backyard. There are hundreds of people all around me. For this year, I think that God is showing me to stay here in the USA. Does that mean that I will not visit my amigos maybe next year? Of course not! I still believe the Lord wants me to go to Mexico someday and I believe it was no mistake that I came across Harvest Language Center. But I am waiting the Lord and taking it one day at a time and am seeing where the Lord will take me. Exciting and scary all at once. Es parte de mi aventura, no!
I want to do a "series" on my family members. I already did my mom, Sydney Dee and tonight's pictures are of my big little brother, Daniel Jay. He's 15 years old and is the baby of the family but also the giant since he towers over all of us girls who average 5'4. He's 6'1. We are at a state park near our home in this picture. There are gorgeous waterfalls and the sun was just perfect creating a wonderful photo opportunity. I gave him my purity ring for a prop and he got down on one knee while I posed trying to look surprised. We wanted to trick people into thinking he was proposing but I don't think it worked :) We have alot of fun together. This picture is awful, I know but it just shows our personalities so well I had to share. We have a thing about taking horrible self portraits on purpose then laughing at them. Weird but fun. Danny really is a handsome boy, just not in this picture :) He is the best brother ever. Even though he is the youngest of 4 kids and the only boy, he has really stepped up and matured over the past couple of years. He's hysterical (unless he's making me mad which happens...) and keeps our family laughing. Right now he has a job at a local pizza/ice cream/ mini golf/ drive in theater joint and has been working almost 40 hour weeks lately. He's the best! (No, our relationship is not perfect but he is my brother and I would die for him.)
Thanks for listening to my confused thoughts. Please pray that I will be open and willing to listen to what the Lord wants me to do and not necessarily what I want to do. Cuidate gente!
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